iBeth

Now Amelia will never know her mood

Amelia lost her mood necklace.  She'd bought it a few days earlier with her own allowance money at the school's "holiday shop" fundraiser and worn it nonstop since then, including our trip to see the Osborne Family Lights.  And somehow, probably while she was dancing in the snow, the mood charm came loose and was irretrievably lost.   "Now I'll never know my mood!" she sobbed in my arms. 

"Can you tell my mood?" I asked after a while.  I mimed different moods for her.  She guessed them all.  "I know," I said, "whenever you're wondering what your mood is, just ask me, and I'll act it out for you." 

She cried some more.  "No, that won't work, Mommy!  Plus," she said through her tears, "I never saw it turn gray!" 

"What does gray mean?" I asked.

"Sad," she said.

I promised that if she ever got another mood necklace*, I would make her sad right away, so that she would be sure to see all the colors.  She was not comforted.

*Fortunately, this calamity happened close to Christmas.  Making her sad on Christmas morning will be quite a job.

Gift shopping for the girls

For those of you asking about possible gifts for the girls, see their wishlist over on the right margin.  They don't have any particular wants, but right now they enjoy Star Trek* and Futurama (in the unlikely event that you find anything themed to those shows).  (*That is, the Treks with Kirk & Spock characters, from either TOS or the recent movie, but not the other Trek series with Picard, Janeway, etc. We have all the dvds already.)  They both like jewelry (necklaces, bracelets, rings) and hair doodads (barrettes, headbands, rubberbands for hair, ponytail decorations) and umbrellas.  Amelia still loves tigers, kittens, and puppies.  Emma still loves cats, kittens, and guinea pigs.  They both like to draw and play board games.  Here are their sizes:

• Emma: shoe size 1, clothes size L or 9/10. (She wears size 8 right now, but not for much longer.)
• Amelia: shoe size 12, clothes size M or 7/8. (She wears size 6x right now, but not for much longer.)

My husband, Super Shopper

My husband is an excellent shopper (he can always tell you where orange juice is two cents cheaper), so he handles most of our household purchases, from bread to milk to toilet paper.  But he outdid himself this time. 

He'd received a $50 cash rebate from BJ's Wholesale Club, issued in the form of a Visa gift card.  When he went to the store to spend it, he decided to use it up in one trip--but he didn't want to buy anything that wasn't already on his shopping list, and he didn't want to spend more than $50 either.  These goals were complicated by taxes: some items we needed were taxed, others not. 

Et voila!  He managed, without using a calculator, to find items that totaled $50.01.  The cashier was so impressed she spotted him the penny.

Proud To Be An American

I just finished purchasing Lee Greenwood's song God Bless The U.S.A. for 6yo Amelia.  She heard the song at a citizenship ceremony a couple of weeks ago and has been humming ever since.  And whenever she hears it, she confided, she thinks about the "nice brown lady" who sings it.  Lee Greenwood does sound like a nice brown lady, don't you think?

Marry me, Mommy. Love, your daughter

6yo Amelia just gave me a note that read, "Marry me, Mommy."  She explained that she knew I was already married to Daddy, and that she was too little to get married, but if she were bigger and if I weren't married she would want to marry me because she loved me very much. 

And I said that I loved her very much and that if I weren't already married and if she were old enough, I would definitely consider marrying her, except that mommies aren't allowed to marry their children. 

Amelia was dumbfounded.  "Why would anyone make a law like that?" she asked.

Tradition, I told her.

Keeping Backpacks New

The school recommends wheeled backpacks for fourth graders, so with some reluctance we bought Emma a sturdy  wheeled backpack with which to carry her textbooks back and forth to school.  I loved her backpack last year--it was well-designed and lightweight.  This year's "backpack" is also well-designed, but bulky and heavy because of the wheels.  I do share the school's desire to protect her back, though.

So you can imagine my dismay when I saw her straining to lug the backpack through the school parking lot by the looped handle at the top.  Concerned, I asked her, "Why are you carrying your backpack? It will roll on the ground." 

She explained, "If I roll the backpack outside, the wheels will get all dirty.  I want it to stay nice for at least two weeks."

No Used Bibles Here

During Friday's dinner, Grandma commented, "Girls, I'm going need to borrow one of your Bibles because I'll want to show pictures from it during Sunday School this weekend."

"Oh!" Amelia said, very excited to be able to help.  "You should use my Bible--I've never even opened it!"

Who do we shoot? Or, Brother can you spare a gun?

Daddy comments on yesterday's post:

Times haven't really changed that much; Amelia just added anger to the song's desperation.  Here's a transcript of that famous scene from The Grapes of Wrath I mentioned at dinner:

In the first of two flashbacks that emphasize the wide gap between the rich and poor classes and the failure of the tenant system, Muley remembers how he, one of the dispossessed, was driven off the land by the Shawnee Land and Cattle Company. The coming of mechanized farming, combined with severe weather conditions, caused landlords to notify homes of possession and force hundreds of tenant farmer families off their lands. An agent (Adrian Morris) of the impersonal company, seated in his automobile, speaks to Muley as he stands and learns with his family that they must leave their homeland. Unconvincingly, Muley learns that there's no-one to blame--not even the bureaucratic companies, banks, and their powerless officers. As the flashback concludes, the half-mad ("touched"), lost Muley speaks movingly, eloquently and poignantly about what the land means to him and his family:

Agent: The fact of the matter, Muley, after what them dusters done to the land, the tenant system don't work no more. You don't even break even, much less show a profit. Why, one man and a tractor can handle twelve or fourteen of these places. You just pay him a wage and take all the crop.

Muley: Yeah, but uh, we couldn't do on any less than what our share is now. Why, the children ain't gettin' enough to eat as it is, and they're so ragged. We'd be ashamed if everybody else's children wasn't the same way.

Agent: I can't help that. All I know is, I got my orders. They told me to tell you to get off, and that's what I'm tellin' ya.

Muley: You mean get off of my own land?

Agent: Now don't go to blamin' me! It ain't my fault.

Muley's son (Hollis Jewell): Who's fault is it?

Agent: You know who owns the land. The Shawnee Land and Cattle Company.

Muley: And who's the Shawnee Land and Cattle Company?

Agent: It ain't nobody. It's a company.

Muley's son: They got a President, ain't they? They got somebody who knows what a shotgun's for, ain't they?

Agent: Oh son, it ain't his fault, because the bank tells him what to do.

Muley's son: All right, where's the bank?

Agent: Tulsa. What's the use of pickin' on him? He ain't nothin' but the manager. And he's half-crazy hisself tryin' to keep up with his orders from the East.

Muley: Then who do we shoot?

Agent: Brother, I don't know. If I did, I'd tell ya. I just don't know who's to blame.

Not like during the Great Depression

A telemarketer call led to a dinner table discussion of the tough economy, why people have to work at unpleasant jobs, and whether people were telemarketers during the Great Depression (yes, we saw that Kit Kittredge movie).  Daddy took the opportunity to introduce some musical history, too.

Daddy: OK, girls, can you fill in the missing words from this song lyric?  "Once I built a railroad, made it run, made it race against _______ ?"

Emma:  Time.

Daddy: Good!  Now it's Amelia's turn.  "Once I built a railroad, now it's done.  Brother, can you spare a ________?"

Amelia: GUN!

Times sure have changed.

Curly Emma

Emma couldn't wait to try the "American Curls" she read about in a book that Grandma gave her: Snooze a palooza! .  She cut out the rags herself (Daddy donated the t-shirt), but Mommy had to put them in her hair.  I felt a bit like Caroline Ingalls.
 
  The curls turned out pretty cute.  Something tells me I have more nights of rag rolling in my future.
 

Awwwww

Love notes from a beau are nice, but nothing can match love notes from your child:
 
  

Dead Turtle Tragedy At Church

As we left church, Emma cried delightedly, "Look!  There's a turtle!"  Just as we turned to gaze at the cute little 6" turtle, the golf cart that ferries elderly parishioners to their cars zoomed past.  SPLAT, right before our eyes.  The turtle did not survive.  A less agnostic, faster thinking mom might have said a prayer, but I just tried to redirect the childrens' attention and (with the help of Grandma), hustled them to the car.  "The turtle has a hard shell, so it is probably ok, right mom?" Emma asked me.  "Maybe," I replied, but that turtle was clearly not ok.  Poor turtle.  The golf cart driver couldn't have seen it camouflaged against the grass . . . but the golf cart would have driven along the path if we hadn't been in the way. 

I hope the turtle carcass is gone by next Sunday.

Flight of the Conchords--So good I might faint

Last night, in a dramatic break from our usual habits, my husband and I went to a Flight of the Conchords concert. 

"What if the show is so good that you faint?" 6yo Amelia asked me, as I was getting ready.
"I wouldn't like that because I'd miss part of the show," I told her.
"Well," she asked, "what if it's so good that you faint at the end of the show? Right at the end, so you don't miss anything?"
"Then Daddy would have a very hard time getting me to the car," I said.

Amelia seemed a bit disappointed that I didn't faint.  But I did find the show to be Very Good.  You can read  reviews here and here, so I'll just say that it was so good, I spent a fair amount of time tonight downloading all the Flight of the Conchords music that I didn't already own.

9yo Emma was delighted to hear that Jemaine performed a trick she has been longing to perform herself: He put his head in a box that had a hole cut on one side for his face (part of their Robots costume, though they wore it for "Too Many Dicks").  Then, he began to turn the box and his head to one side.  As he continued to turn the face-hole towards his back, he really quick turned his head to the other side (while it was hidden in the box).  Then, his face reappeared in face-hole as the box continued turning, so that it look like he'd turned his head a full 360 degrees!  You can see the trick in the last 10 seconds of this video.  Emma thought of this trick several days ago, but she doesn't yet have a good box to do it with.

Kristin Schaal (who plays FOTC fan Mel on the tv show) gave us a very funny warm-up act.  My favorite line: "Were we lesbians?  We were more than that--we were BESTbians!"  That, and her jokes about Florida.  "Even if you had the worst day possible and got hit by a car when you were riding your bike, at least while you were waiting for an ambulance, you could lie under this beautiful palm tree!"

I was pleased that FOTC performed "If You're Into It." Bret was at the keyboard, ready to do a different song (Sellotape of Love)--but came back to his guitar to play "If You're Into It" after the audience kept clamoring for it, then returned to the keyboard for "Sellotape," the song they ended with.  So it seemed that "If You're Into It" was a bonus, just for us.

If you aren't familiar with FOTC, this video of Business Time will give you a good idea of what you've been missing.  (After you see that video, you will wonder, as I do, WHY oh WHY does FOTC not sell t-shirts that say "Team Building Exercise 99"?)  Their "What the Folk!" homepage is also worth a look. And you can legally download a free copy of "Hurt Feelings" (another of my favorite songs) here.

Restaurant Betrayal

I've been holding a sobbing Emma in my arms, comforting her as she cried bitter tears over a betrayal.  Crispers changed its menu and no longer offers her favorite turkey sandwich. 

"Sweet Tomatoes is now my favorite restaurant!" she declared through her tears.  And she will never be hungry again.

That's Exactly Why I Hate Grownups!

Amelia lost the coin toss, so she will take the first shower every night this week.  Thirty-five minutes ago, we reminded her that she needed to take a shower.  She stripped naked.  She goofed off.  Thirty minutes ago, we reminded her about her shower.  She goofed off.  Twenty-five minutes ago, we reminded her.  Twenty minutes ago, she disappeared into the bathroom.  Five minutes ago, she resurfaced to request some strawberries leftover from dinner.  She was bone dry, as in, she had not even started her shower. 

"Amelia!" I exclaimed, exasperated.  "Why haven't you taken your shower yet?  Get into that shower NOW."

"But I just wanted the strawberries first," she said.

"NO STRAWBERRIES.  TAKE YOUR SHOWER."

She crossed her arms and stomped her feet.  "That's EXACTLY why I hate grownups!" she announced and vanished into the bathroom.

Birthday Gift Ideas

People are asking me for gift ideas, now that we're headed into birthday season.

This information from Christmas is still accurate, but I'm buying bigger sizes now:

• Emma = size 9, size 8 in pants, children's shoe size 12.5 or 1
• Amelia = size 7, children's shoe

Emma loves Club Penguin.  Amelia loves Club Penguin and tigers.  Check the right margin for a link to their Amazon wishlist.   Thanks for thinking of them.

Tutu Fun

The girls were thrilled to wear new dresses to a "Tea for Tutu" benefit for the Surfscape Dance Company.  The party featured yummy finger foods (scones, muffins, chocolate chip cookies, and colorful fresh fruit, in addition to the traditional crustless sandwiches), delicious drinks (Emma drank hot tea with not enough sugar, while Amelia sipped pink lemonade from a real glass), and real live dancers!  A friend kindly snapped this pic of my beautiful girls (note the gloves, and the matching necklaces from grammy. 
Later, they danced with the dancers and socialized with friends.  Amelia was too busy dancing to pose for the later pictures.  That's my mother-in-law in the photos with me.
  

Amelia Draws Pinocchio

Daddy showed the girls a newly restored Pinocchio, and they are fans. Amelia was inspired to create her own drawings: Gimeny Cricet, Monstero, and "turning into a donkey."
 

Kids Love EPCOT

At least, my kids do.  Right now, we have passes that let us enter EPCOT after 4:00 p.m.  One day, the weather was beautiful, the crowd calendar predicted light traffic, and we were even able to get a dinner reservation at the Biergarten (the girls had never before eaten at any of the parks' table service restaurants), so we hopped in the car and headed down to WDW.

We had a terrific time!  The girls loved the pretzel rolls and Amelia ate her first piece of cheesecake.  We enjoyed the dinner show, in which the musicians played instruments ranging from the accordian to alp horns to cowbells to a xylophone. 

Afterwards, we rode on Test Track, another first for all of us except Daddy.  Although it was sad to walk through the GM showroom afterwards, knowing that many of the cars will likely no longer exist soon (Saturn, Humvee, Saab), the ride itself was fantastic.  I hope both GM and the ride manage to survive this economy.

We also took a spin through Spaceship Earth and were delighted to discover that upgrades had been made to the ride since we were on it last.  We particularly loved seeing our own faces in the animation at the end.

But the best part of the trip was playing the Kim Possible adventure!  Emma finished secret missions in the U.K. (where she flooded a window) and in Mexico (where she made a rocket launch from a volcano).  Alas, we brought no camera with us, but you can see another family's pictures of the game here. 

As we solved the puzzles, we enjoyed the reactions from other guests. One elderly woman was peering at an audioanimatronic parrot when Emma prompted it to begin chattering about rocket launch codes and evil scientists, to the woman's obvious confusion.  At another location, a young boy exclaimed excitedly, "Dad!  Dad!  That skeleton was talking, Dad!  Did you see that, Dad!"  Emma was proud to have impressed another kid.

As we left the park, Emma said, "The other kids in school think EPCOT is boring.  They think only the Magic Kingdom is fun.  I keep telling them that EPCOT is not boring!  Now just wait until they hear about how I saved the world!" 

Note to Imagineers: well done.

Amelia Needs No Beauty Shop Guy

Amelia is tired of bangs close to her eyes, she has been telling me.  So last Saturday, while no one was paying much attention, she took matters into her own hands. 

I think she did a better job than Junie B.

But I hope she doesn't do it again.